In just a few days of this writing, Pam and I will celebrate our 18th fruitful year of marriage. Indeed, eighteen most fruitful years it has been. Had anyone mentioned during our pre marital counseling that we would be having seven kids with a set of Quads in middle well, I would have been concerned. If they had went on to detail my being their at home dad we might not be having this discussion.
God’s ways, plans and timing are so often not working from our wish list. One thing I know however is His way, time and plan is perfect, and the only glitch is our acceptance and cooperation. Stuff happens, hard stuff, sad stuff, great stuff, unexpected stuff all fill and deplete our lives sails every day. Weather we fell tossed about by random gales or guided by a loving hand is our call.
Now 18 years may not sound like a lot to some folks. At our church every Sunday, we hear announcement about anniversaries. 30, 40, 50 even 60 years and beyond all met with great applause. Brethren and sisteren we are part of a set of generations where those numbers may be all but unheard of.
George Barna and Gallup both agree that the divorce rate for the churched and non-churched are about the same. In fact we church folk are a fraction of a percentage ahead in the number of marital breakups. Thank God for mercy and that margin of error thing!
Having grown up in a household rocked by three divorces I have seen the damage done. I have lived the restoration possible. I have made it my purpose to not recreate any of it. At your Pastor’s invitation, I would like to open up a dialog with you here.
I have a bit to share on what creates strength and commitment to grow in a marriage. In addition, I have an insight or two on how to make it work even with a load of little ones in the mix.
Anyone interested?
In His Love,
Mike Poff
“Not by power, nor by might, but by My Spirit, says the Lord”
Congratulations on 18 years. It’s definitely something to celebrate and it sound like a long time to me since I’m not even one year into marriage.
I appreciate that you took the time to comment on such an important topic. The most impressive aspect of your dialog is that you look at this from a humble perspective. It was good to hear somebody acknowledge that just simply being a church-going person doesn’t make you better at marriage. It shows that it’s a challenge to all people whether they attend church, are of a certain faith, or don’t believe in religion or spirituality at all. Realizing that people of all backgrounds struggle just as much as we do is a necessary viewpoint when trying to keep a marriage strong – we don’t deny that it’s expected to be hard sometimes, and that better prepares us to work through those times.
Of course, I barely know what I’m talking about since I’m a newbie and I can’t say Scott and I have had to deal with any real challenges, yet. I’m just enjoying what I expect to be a lifetime relationship – one that will be worth my while no matter how it may challenge me at times.
Thanks again for your post.
ET
Thanks Erin and congrats on being a “newbie”. There has to some serious humility in marriage. Mainly cause it is not about us as individuals. Marriage, kids and family are a special path God has given us to impact lives and the world well into the future for good or for ill. Loose sight of this and everyone looses.
A new post is coming. Thanks for your feedback as I want to provoke thought and discussion. Enjoy the “us” time.
Blessings,
MikeP